OK, listen, seriously, "as a woman" or whatever, look over what is happening with this, which I was already telling over at: >>1554446
, and I am really thinking that I can parlay this whole thing into an actual /out/ gf, but what I was meaning before, all this time, this 5 years, I have been envisioning it all on my own, alone, no one else to answer to or be responsible for in any way, just following my on Tao wherever it might lead. I had zero intention of getting into an actual "relationship" anytime soon, in fact I had assumed the Universe would be sending the right miracle situation ahead somewhere out there, probably a rich chick that could have us both hooked up with health insurance! But then I run into this situation out of nowhere, and I'm not sure of what I either should or "can" do, like, if I did it, would I really be able to devote 100% for probably the remainder of my days? Would I even like in terms of relational compatibility over a long hauls and all that? And what if it is absolutely the most blessed and perfect path I can choose from, but I choose wrong and fuck up?