it appears you have special snowflake syndrome
typical symptoms include attention seeking on anonymous image boards, bitching about mundane shit like 'i feel a bit upset time to get drunk :^( hey look guys i'm suicidal please suck my cock', and thinking they deserve something by simply wishing they had it.
there are a few solutions:
pay through the nose to tell your life story to someone who occasionally nods and then prescribes as many high drugs as they can
actually get your shit together and not be a failure. this one is a bit difficult as it involves admitting you are a lazy tard who just looks for a scapegoat for every problem
and of course, actual suicide
hope this helped!
and of course, this is /wg/, have one of my favourites