I've been a cynical pessimist my whole life. Always beat myself up, always told myself how worthless I was, a good for nothing has-been that never was. Yet deep down I know I'm a decent person, sometimes a great person when compared to certain people I've met. Yet, all those people always seemed much happier than me, and doing more with their lives and content with themselves. So I'm doing something really difficult, as of now, and that is, trying. I am trying to be a better person. Trying to be motivated. Trying to be ambitious and passionate about something. Trying to not put myself down, but pull myself up. Trying to stand up straight, until its not trying anymore but simply doing. So here's my dump of paps.