Oh also anon I want to tell you about how I lost weight. I was 50 lbs heavier than the healthy weight for my height. Knew I had to stop living like a slob and knew I needed to get right. So I went to /fit/, read the sticky, made a thread, talked to a bunch of anons, read a ton of their motivational stuff, and got to work. I never knew that you don't actually even have to exercise to lose weight: I lost that 50lbs over the remainder of the year simply by counting calories and eating less. My exercise was 4chan and video games. That being said, now I'm exercising regularly and it feels so good. Your body wants to return to its correct natural state you just have to let it.
I don't know what's been going on in your life but I need you to believe me when I tell you that it can get better. Sometimes you can't improve what's around you and I acknowledge that. But you can always improve yourself and gain a strong temperament. Nobody in this whole world is going to make your life change but yourself. You have the power RIGHT NOW to get your ass up and go out for a walk. You have the power to sit down with a book and read and gain that knowledge that will help your mind or heart or soul. You owe it to yourself to do the right thing and make positive changes in your life. It will not be easy and you will have to fight your old self every day but the more you do it and succeed, the farther away from your past you get.
I believe in you, man. I will never meet you in my life but I will be thinking of you and hoping and praying that you are on your path and that you will go forward into the future with all the world in front of you and the sun glorifying you as you fight on.