I can't live only for myself, vanity hits me like nothing else but everyone around me, except my grandmother, is telling me that's it's the (modern) way to go.
For the last 2 years I've been in a relationship with a girl (27) that I met 11 years ago, I've had my way with many women but I never allowed myself to even think about being with her one day.
She was my "best" internet friend all this time and one day she came to me saying that she wanted me, admired me etc. She didn't know that she was just my type.
She's a unicorn, smart, passionate, stunningly beautiful, curious, we read the same books etc.
I basically NEVER get bored when I'm around her and boy do I get bored often with women.
I put everything in our relationship, everything I did was meant to let me be an stay with her.
Thing is, she's in a burnout situation with her job, her biological clock is ticking and she went mental in october then asked for a "break" saying that she doesn't know where we're going and she doesn't even know what she wants.
She says she loves me and that she misses me but I had to move out of our place, that we shouldn't talk during this break (6 months) but she keeps sending me texts "I'm thinking about you, good night" or "I'm looking at pictures of you but I shouldn't say that".
She even told me that she couldn't forbid me to have sex with other women for the time being even though I never asked for this and don't even want that. Whenever I mention a female friend she becomes jealous.
She's acting like a child but I want her back in my life, what we had was meaningful to me and nothing else really matters.