>>Gets on extra-wide mobility scooter.
>>Heads outside via the back cuz can't fit through front.
>> Exits via extra-wide garage, opening door manually too hard so presses the extra-large button to open garage automatically.
>>Tips garage door.
>>Sun makes me sweaty, need a drink so goes to Macdonald's for a 12gallon cocka cola.
>>I'm here now, I might as well get some burgers. Gets 20, on a diet. Tips extra-wide drive-thru lane, tips employee but can't reach over the top roll of fat so throws freedom-coins at employee.
>>Drives home, it's so healthy to get some sun.
>>Reaches top of driveway starts to slow down, battery flat. Takes shotgun from between fat-roll 2&3, shoots freedom scooter.
>>Falls out of freedom scooter, causes 5.7 on Richter scale, California's always getting quakes, nobody will notice.
>>Rolls all the way down the street picking up momentum.
>>Blames Obama care for weak, state-funded mobility scooter.
>>McDonalds at the bottom of the hill, unavoidable impact.
>>Burgers fly everywhere, opens mouth to catch a few, opens up all fat-rolls to catch as many burgers as possible for later.