I recently went through a series of panic attacks and a month of constant anxiety until finally I saw a doctor about it and got on medication, something I've tried to avoid before this but I just can't fucking take it anymore. If I'm gonna have to be on SSRIs for 10 years then so be it, if it prevents those feelings of like worthlessness and panic from happening to me randomly then I'll do it. I'll take the comedown over that.
My friends from work and school were very supportive and nice to me, which also made me realize I had very few casual friends. I have a bunch left over from high school that I talk to a lot online, but I can't really go out to eat with anyone. It's hard to find things to do with a bunch of people with basically random schedules.